Pleasure, Intimacy & Relationships Advice

What You Need to Know About Arousal A guide to understanding your body, your desire, and the science of getting turned on Most people grow up thinking arousal should be instant—like flipping a switch. You see something sexy, feel desire, and your body responds. Simple, right? Not exactly. Arousal is one of the most misunderstood…

The Moment You Return to Your Body: Awakening Somatic Erotic Embodiment You don’t notice it at first—the way your shoulders soften, the way your breath starts to deepen, the way your body feels just a little more like home. It happens slowly, in those quiet moments when life finally stops demanding something from you. Tonight,…

Why You Might Need a Sex Therapist: A Story About Coming Home to Yourself Maybe your story starts the way so many do. You’re lying in bed one night, staring at the ceiling, wondering why something that was supposed to feel natural has become confusing, distant, or even stressful. You think about how your desire…

Why You Should Consider Seeing a Sex Therapist: Understanding the Benefits of Sexual Wellness Support Sex is an important part of the human experience. It’s tied to pleasure, connection, identity, and emotional well-being. But it’s also one of the most challenging issues to talk about openly. Many people struggle silently with concerns about desire, performance,…

Explore Your Sexual Desire & Reignite the Passion Within You may be asking yourself, “What happened to my sexual desire?”Struggling with low libido and low sex drive can be confusing and discouraging. You want to feel that spark again—but here’s the truth: we easily accept that we don’t always crave certain foods, activities, or experiences.…

Sexual Fantasies: What Do They Mean? Sexual fantasies are as common as daydreaming. Imagining ourselves in a hot tryst with a (several) flight attendant(s), being desired by strangers at a sex party, doing unspeakable things with a celebrity crush, being punished by a cruel owner or getting paid for sexual acts we’d never do in…

How To Initiate Sex Initiating sex can be uncomfortable for many of us. You may be the type who initiates by grabbing a part of your partner’s body when they least expect it – usually resulting in a slap or a shove and a NO! Perhaps you’re the begrudging “You know it’s been (insert number…

Elevate Your Polyamory Journey: 10 Expert Tips for Healthy Non-Monogamy One of the most significant social shifts in recent years is the growing interest in – and visibility of – polyamory and non-monogamy. These forms of open relationships, plus other relationship diversities, involve romantic and/or sexual relationships with more than one person, either together as…

Help! Our Sex Drives Don’t Match! Feeling Stuck When It Comes to Sex and Connection? You’re Not Alone. We live in a world more connected than ever, but somehow, many of us feel lonelier and less satisfied in our relationships. It’s frustrating. We have more freedom of choice than past generations could dream of, but…

Learn the secrets of mind-blowing sex and how to keep it that way! Make sex better!

How Do I Give My Wife An Orgasm? Hi Cyndi, I am married, age 37, and to date have not been able give my wife a single orgasm. I feel ashamed and miserable about this. Is there a single act where this can be achieved? Carl Hey Carl Thanks for your question. I often hear…

5 Ways to Increase Your Pleasure Tonight In my practice, I meet many people, especially women who struggle with their sexual pleasure. After all, we live in a culture that really doesn’t value and prioritize pleasure in any way, so sometimes it’s difficult to know where to start. But the truth is, it doesn’t have…

How Can I Get More From My Sex Life? I teach people how to have sex – for a living! It’s the best job in the world. After all these years of erotic detective work, I have discovered what works. Common issues clients seek me out for include: orgasm problems libido issues erection problems and…

One of the most common reasons people seek my services is because they’re struggling—in their sex lives, relationships, or connection to their own bodies and pleasure. Not long ago, I received a DM on Instagram that said: “I saw your post about making sex great, and I realized that even though I love my partner,…

In the hustle of New York City life, it’s easy for intimacy to take a backseat. Whether you’re in a long-term relationship, newly dating, or navigating intimacy as an individual, feeling disconnected can be disheartening. But here’s the good news: intimacy isn’t lost—it just needs a little attention. That’s where sex therapy comes in. What…

Are You Working Smarter—or Just More?Yesterday, at a business meeting in NYC, a colleague proudly shared how an app helped him get up two hours earlier to work—more.More work? Really? It struck me how often we confuse productivity with grinding harder, not smarter. Waking up earlier to spend time on what truly matters—passions, joy, connection—makes…

Why Can’t I Come During Sex?*This article is referring exclusively to ciswomen & men”Why can’t I orgasm during sex?” She asks me…perplexed and bewildered.If I had a dollar for every time I was asked that question, I’d not only be laughing all the way to the bank, I’d also be making sure everybody knew what…

How To Have Great SexWhat makes sex great? People have been asking this question for aeons, but wonder no more. According to research, there are 8 crucial elements to optimal sex….and what’s not mentioned may surprise you.This is why there will never ever be a pill for great sex. You have it within you already.…

Help! I’m losing attraction to my partner!For a lot people in relationships, one thing that comes up often is the fear of what losing attraction to a partner implies. The thought of having to even ‘work’ to get it back feels daunting because so much of what culture teaches us is that love is effortless…

 Asking For What You WantWhat’s it like to ask for what you want? I mean to really let yourself be seen in your request?In sex and relationships, many of us hide behind wishes, implied or ignored, hoping that our needs will be met. We remain silent or drop hints about our desires and longings hoping the other…

Listening to Your Limits: How to Recognize and Set Healthy BoundariesMany people don’t recognize their boundaries until they’re crossed. Boundaries often reveal themselves through life experiences rather than introspection alone. We discover them in moments of discomfort, when we’re faced with situations that challenge our values and limits.This discomfort might show up as unease before…

Vulnerability, The Last Taboo? In fragile times, it’s often our most intimate and close relationships that suffer. Intimacy is the glue, the enhancer that gives us the drive to connect, and in many situations, also the factor that can be a passion killer for some and the straw that breaks the camel’s back. I have…

Sex, Relationships & The Single PersonAre you tired of reading about sex and relationships advice that always centers partnered people and those in relationships? Me too.  So here I want to talk to the single people, because singles are often left out of discussions  of sex and relationships, not to mention the effects of living…

When a significant relationship has run its course, some of the pain we experience is about letting go of your own history, your shared story. A part of yourself ceases to be in the same form. This is its own special kind of grief.