The Desire Series
Online Course for Low Libido & Mismatched Desire
rekindle desire online course boost your sex drive low libido in women low sex drive men
How do you solve a problem like low libido & mismatched desire?
- Imagine approaching sex with joy instead of dread and anxiety.
- Imagine having the skills to confidently know and express your desire, even if it's different to your partners'.
- What if I told you, you could boost your libido and rekindle desire by making a few simple changes?
- What if you knew that everything we believe about desire is a lie?
- What if you actually discovered the confidence & ease you long for in your authentic sexual expression?
- What if I told you that your struggles are not your fault and there are a multitude of solutions?
Lynn and Rowan walked into my office one evening after a busy work day. Lynn flopped onto the leather sofa and crossed her legs. Her energy was heavy and expectant. As such consultations go, she explained to me that Rowan was a great guy and their lives and relationship were ‘pretty good’. In fact, she mentioned it several times, as clients often do when they really, really want me to know something. Swinging her shoe back and forth from her toe, she breathed a weighty, troubled sigh. And before she uttered another word, tears welled in her eyes. She apologized for this, as for her, the teary response seemed disproportionate to what she was about to tell me. After all, sex isn’t a big deal, it certainly doesn’t justify tears. Except for when it does.
Rowan looked down at the floor. Partly ashamed and partly overwhelmed, he seemed familiar with this tableau – and for no reason other than experience, so was I. Here were two lovers, strangers to me, but not to each other, stuck in a bind around sex that is all too common. “I love him and I love our relationship but I’m just not feeling ‘it’ anymore” she said. “I’m not sure how much longer I can do this – like this”. “Do what?” I inquired “Our relationship – the sex I mean. I just don’t want it any more. I used to love sex, I used to really look forward to it, but something has died within me. It’s breaking Rowan’s heart.” “It looks most certainly like it’s breaking yours too” I replied. Lynn was visibly distressed by the current situation with her sex life. “What does it say about you that you feel like this?” I inquired. More tears came and she raised her hands to her face to cover the pain she felt. “I feel broken, defective. I shouldn’t be feeling like this, but yet – I do.” “What’s broken”? I whispered to her gently. “What’s defective?” She looked confused because I didn’t immediately concur that she was the problem.The Desire Series helps demystify erotic desire by making it part of your everyday life. It offers you tried and tested transformational wisdom and skills to stop struggling and start loving. In The Desire Series you will:
- Learn how desire works for you and your partner/s
- Dissolve unhelpful ideas about sex that are stifling your curiosity and inspiration
- Discover meaningful erotic values and permission-granting strategies that orient you both toward more pleasure
- Explore a multitude of ways to share your discoveries with lovers and partners even if your desires seem to be worlds apart
- Practice techniques for understanding and managing mismatched desire in relationships
- And recognize it’s perfectly OK to have no desire for sex, yet still explore a rich and fulfilling playful connection with your beloved/s.
- explore what desire really means to you and why this is essential in your quest to unlock passion
- learn to approach mismatched desires with confidence in ways that work for your relationship/s, no matter how long you've been together or what you're into
- discover how to solve the inevitable challenges that arise when exploring mismatched desire
- understand the role of risk-taking and how to hold yourself and your relationship close while maintaining boundaries and self care
- feel pleasure and connection in your relationships even when your erotic desires aren't perfectly matched.
“The Desire Series made me feel normal again! As a woman in perimenopause, I was beating myself for having low desire, when I realized, my desire is normal, and I am normal, and just because I don’t want sex as much as I used to, there is nothing “wrong” with me, or nothing to “fix.” This actually increases my desire, because I can come from a place of self-acceptance, and it gives me permission to explore new ideas, even with a monogamous partner of 13 years. Thank you for increasing my awareness, my self-love, and for showing me ways to be clear about what I want now, and to ask for it!” - BB
Like with anything worthwhile, if we want to master something, we need to invest in it. To learn it. Practice it and dedicate some time to it. Sex is one of those things.
This is a program for people ready to tackle the discomfort of mismatched desire and rise to the challenge of rebooting your sex life. Even if your partner is not yet on board, you can start alone as the process is an invaluable complement to expanding your erotic intelligence. This course explores the known science and theory behind desire and also the esoteric knowledge of desire’s ways that creates your unique desire blueprint. The techniques I share I didn’t learn in therapy school. In therapy school, you never talk about lust and passion. You never talk about desire. And you never talk about eroticism. This is why most therapists know nothing about sex and even fewer know about pleasure.
This is why I made The Desire Series.
Most of these techniques I have learned from my hundreds of clients and thousands of hours in the chair (and a few in the bed too). I've studied what works. Exploring options and understanding that science alone is just the tip of the iceberg.
What research and science both confirm is strategy is key to maintaining desire, but without a clear path, without clear skills and without a shared vision – what’s the point?
But this program may not be for everyone
If you have experienced lifelong 'no desire' ever - no interest in sex with other people at all - at any stage in your life & think you may be part of the 1% who identify as asexual, this program may not be for you. There is a big difference between lower desire & mismatched desire as part of an erotic relationship and asexuality as an ongoing sexual orientation. You're invited to consider if asexuality is a descriptor that authentically fits for you. The Desire Series is for people who once wanted sex and want to want it again, or couples experiencing mis-matched desires and difficulties in connecting sexually. If you are seriously on the edge of divorce, separation and/or having ongoing chronic arguments, this course is not for you - yet. It is not a course in solving serious relationship conflict / violence. This course is for people still in love or at least 'in like', who want to want sex again and have just lost their way. The course contains a lot of communication skills training, but it's not geared toward resolving chronic conflict and ongoing crisis arguments.
Right now, you have two options...You can continue as you have been, hoping things will get better, avoiding the frustration, underwhelm and disappointment of 'business-as-usual' sex or you can make the decision to do something different, to learn more about how to explore desire with confidence and support. Suitable for all genders, levels of interest and orientations. If you long to reclaim your erotic vitality, join me for The Desire Series.
Who is Cyndi Darnell?
I’m an internationally renowned clinical sexologist, sex and relationship therapist, sex coach and couple's counselor. My work has been featured around the world on TV, radio and print media including international publications like The Washington Post, New York Magazine, O-The Oprah Magazine, The Huffington Post, The Guardian, Vice, Mind Body Green, Bustle, Cosmo and so many more. I have spent over 20 years studying and exploring human sexuality, pleasure, connection, emotions and relationships, not to mention having my own fair share of experiences along the way. It’s the culmination of this work that has lead me here to create this online school for you. So many of us get no sex education, limited sex education or simply do not know how to integrate the information we find about sex online. Many of us have no one to talk to about this stuff and some of us don’t feel comfortable even discussing this with our partners. There is still a stigma about seeing a sex therapist or asking for help because we are expected to just magically know how sex works, as if sex is natural and everything we need to know gets downloaded by magic with no effort on our part at all. But none of this is true. Just like learning to paint, draw or cook, we must learn from someone who knows more than we do, at least to get us started on new techniques. Imagine approaching sex with same curiosity and excitement you feel about taking a new class instead of dread or awkwardness. Imagine having the skills to be able to really understand yourself, your body and your partner’s body and truly share that with another. Like with anything worthwhile, if we want to master something, we need to invest in it. To learn it. Practice it and dedicate some time to it. Sex is one of those things. Right now you have two options. You can continue as you have been, hoping things will get better, avoiding the frustration, underwhelm and disappointment of 'business-as-usual' sex or you can make the decision to do something different, to learn more about sex, pleasure desire, touch, the body and so much more. I am super excited to have these offerings for you and I look forward sharing my knowledge and expertise to help you create a life worth loving.